


Competing With a Ghost

by MapleHere



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: F/F, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Fullmetal Alchemist: Conqueror of Shamballa, Winry Rockbell-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-02
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-15 12:47:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29808603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MapleHere/pseuds/MapleHere
Summary: ~PRO/R*YED SHIPPERS DNI~Fingers brushed gently against the nape of her neck before grazing her scalp in a trail up to her ponytail and releasing her hair from the elastic.  "Winry..." Paninya sighed, winding both arms around her and resting her chin atop the blonde's crown.  "I don't...I'm not asking you to stop grieving.  I can't ask you to do that," Winry wrapped her own arms around her girlfriend's waist underneath the oversized overalls and balled her hands in the back of her shirt, "but I can't compete with a ghost..."~PRO/R*YED SHIPPERS DNI~
Relationships: Edward Elric/Winry Rockbell, Paninya/Winry Rockbell
Comments: 3
Kudos: 10





	Competing With a Ghost

**Author's Note:**

> Another in the series of fics where I kick the shit out of 03 Winry just because her character is so interesting to explore oop--
> 
> this was written as a writing sprint with a friend, so enjoy a piece that takes place roughly 8-ish years after CoS!
> 
> Also bc it never fails to not be made clear enough in my summary:
> 
> R*YEDDIES AND PROSHIPPERS ARE NOT WELCOME HERE.

Winry sighed softly as she removed her metalworking gloves and shook her head. There was _something_ about the plating she was working on that just...wasn't working out, but she couldn't quite place it. She tossed the dirt-caked gauntlets onto her workbench and lifted her visor once she had powered down her grinder. She jumped slightly when a soft knock pulled her from her thoughts and turned to find Paninya, hands in the pockets of her overalls as she leaned forward expectantly.

"I thought you said you'd quit working so late if you got your own shop," Paninya said, half-smirking.

Winry sighed and shook her head as she unzipped the top of her coveralls. "This shinguard isn't cooperating―I've had to melt it back down and start over _three times."_ The blonde removed her faceguard and pulled her bandana down from its place on her forehead. "The Bensons need this done by the weekend, but I just―the design is―"

"It's Ed's," Paninya interrupted, leaning her hip against the doorframe. "Right? It's the same design you made for Ed."

Winry looked down at the bandana in her hands, gripping the fabric tightly. "How did you know?" she asked, voice nearly silent.

"Because you only ever struggle like this when you're modifying his designs." Winry's shoulders fell, and she tried her best not to look up as Paninya stepped forward. "It's been eight years, Win..." her companion said softly, right hand coming up to cup the technician's cheek. "He's not―"

"He's not coming back. I know." Her tone was harsher than she'd intended, and she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I know," she repeated, the edge to her words worn down by grief. "He's gone, and he's never coming back, and there's nothing I can do about it. 'Why am I still hung up on him,' right?"

Winry lifted her gaze to meet Paninya's brown eyes, leaning into her hand with a tired smile. She knew what she probably looked like―eyes empty, lips pressed into a thin curve that held no meaning. "You know that's not what I was going to say," Paninya said, brows furrowing slightly. "He was my friend, too, Win. They both were."

Winry lifted her own hand to hold Paninya's against her face with the smallest shake of her head. "Nini..." There was a brief pause before Winry sighed and leaned forward to rest her forehead against Paninya's collarbones. "It's different for me. You _know_ it's different."

Fingers brushed gently against the nape of her neck before grazing her scalp in a trail up to her ponytail and releasing her hair from the elastic. "Winry..." Paninya sighed, winding both arms around her and resting her chin atop the blonde's crown. "I don't...I'm not asking you to stop grieving. I can't ask you to do that," Winry wrapped her own arms around her girlfriend's waist underneath the oversized overalls and balled her hands in the back of her shirt, "but I can't compete with a ghost..."

The blonde's eyes shut, and she couldn't help the way her breath hitched in her chest. "What...what does that mean?" Winry choked out. _Do I want to know?_

"Would you ever marry me?" Paninya's question was quiet, careful.

"I...what are you asking?"

"We've been together for...a long time," Paninya said softly, and Winry could hear the catch in her voice, "but would you ever marry me? If I proposed, and if we had a wedding...would you want me as your wife?"

Winry's eyes opened then, and she realized exactly what Paninya was asking. "Is...is that what you want?" she asked, burying her face in the darker woman's neck as she closed the space between them.

"Is that what _you_ want?" Paninya echoed.

A dull ache filled Winry's chest as she closed her eyes once again, tears beginning to leak from them without her permission as every part of her screamed, _No!_ Every time she'd considered marriage as a child, long before portals and alchemy had stolen her best friend from her, she'd imagined him there with her. Even now, as Paninya offered a tentative proposal, she couldn't see herself at an altar with anyone else.

A soft sigh left the taller woman, and a sob was pulled from Winry's chest at her next words.

"That's what I thought."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Comments are always appreciated! Thank you so much to my friend Liam (idiotwerewolf) for his help with this work! You can find him here on AO3 at that username, and you can find me on tumblr at maples-pages or rizathehawkseyehawkeye!


End file.
